Confessions of a Recovering Perfectionist
The Lesson Journal of Judith Tarr

Friday, October 15

Well, the two female Eleves at the SRS have passed their month's probation and are now officially enrolled, with names and everything. There has been flapping and squawking among the traditionalist fans of the SRS, but the School has been careful only to offer positive commentary. Hard to say what the riders really think, but considering how many of them make a strong side career of teaching women riders, many on Lipizzan stallions, I suspect that whatever their feelings about Tradition, they're just fine with the girls as riders.

The stallions, from what I've observed, give it four hooves up. It's a well-known secret that women can handle stallions Just Fine, and in fact stallions are more likely to cooperate with a woman (i.e. alpha mare) than a man (i.e. rival). In the photos I've seen, the stallions have that softly goofy look they get when they're happy.

Speaking of stallions, Pook and I had another lesson with S yesterday. We had, between weather and cascading mechanical failures, not ridden as much as I would have liked, but even what we did do allowed some important pennies to drop.

At first I had a hard time recapping the lesson. Tried on him, tried on Pandora. Realized rather abruptly what was wrong. I've been conditioned to fix myself into a pose. When the pose didn't work, I was taught to blame my own imperfection. It never occurred to me that it was the fault of the pose.

The pose, as we learned last time, has been locking down Pooka's neck and shoulders. Attempts to fix this by manipulating his neck or pushing his shoulders over only resulted in more lockdown. We were also going at the issue of straightness by pushing him over into the hindleg he was less willing to use, in the belief that forcing him off balance would make him use the leg to keep from falling down.

Meanwhile I had years' worth of collapsing left hip and overactive left hand, and a tendency to look down instead of forward when turning, especially to the right – on a warpp-equipped exercise ball like Pooka, that was enough to throw him off balance right when he needed to be straight up and down.

What I needed to do was stop Doing Anything, and just sit. And keep sitting, with small experimental alterations here and there, until I got the gait and feel I wanted. Which at that point was the Big Walk with swinging barrel and stretchy neck.

And, you know, Relax. That's the big one.

No posing. No right or wrong, just Feels Good.

So we came to the lesson with a nice handful of virtual pennies. S gave us a sequence to help with the road to Feels Good: Check where I am (especially that my breastbone is forward), then check the horse: barrel swing, bend, and lift of back. Also, with him, neck should be nice and long and soft and supple, with good flexion through the throat and poll (since he tends to pop into a right banana on his own). And left hind should be activated so that it can come well up and under.

It's all done through the seat, then a little leg to encourage the swing and lift, and the rein for now needs to find out where it needs to be in order to support the flexion. It's kind of up and out and soft. As he gets more used to carrying himself there, I can return to default position.

Even from the first lesson to the second, S noticed a distinct improvement in his forward and straight, and in my ditto. His circle work was very soft and flowing and through, and when he was really comfortable, he decided he wanted to collect, on his own, because it was a cool thing to do.

We added in trot this time. The instruction was to make the walk bigger and swingier and softer, and up the ante. Result when it worked: smooth and flowing transition. We couldn't sustain a sitting trot for long, but by the time we were done we had about half a circle. Which for Pook aka Mr. Boingity in a sitting trot was a first. And the down transition was smoother than it's ever been, as well.

It's really interesting to work with a bodywork person who also teaches riding, because if she sees something in horse or rider that needs hands-on work, she'll stop and do that. She was working on Pooka's neck to stretch and straighten it, by sinking her hand into the front edge of the scapula and slowly runnig it down around the point of the shoulder. Tne endorphin release was so dramatic he was swaying on his feet, blinking and nodding and chewing, and his neck completely remodeled into a long, evenly balanced, beautiful structure. I'm to do that with him for homework, as well as the rest, to help make the remodeling permanent.

He loved it. He didn't want me to get off or her to leave. When he was in motion he was working quite hard, very forward and then, of his own volition, collected.

I'm not running into my old bad habits much at all. No collapsing left hip, overactive left hand, or tendency to drop my head to the right when turning in that direction. Plus the tension issues are much less. He's much straighter and smoother and freer, and when we've got it together, it's a truly beautiful feeling, big and soft and swoopy.

And yes, she did sneak in some shoulder in, without calling it that. She uses lateral work quite a bit to develop balance, forward, and transitions. Pook had no shoulder-in, he was so blocked. The pose I had been put in, though I resisted the extremes of the leg position, had me perched on him like a clothespin. Returning my torso to vertical and truly (instead of just apparently) opening the seat, plus activating the hindleg to get balance rather than dumping him onto it, has taken care of an amazing number of persistent problems.

As S noted, with a horse like this, there is no margin for error. Either you get it right the first time or it's just not happening. But you don't do it by DOING stuff. You do it by sitting quietly and letting him tell you what's right and what's not working. It makes for a much deeper connection and a much more pleasant, harmonious ride. It also eliminates the dink factor, and gives you a forward, balanced, collected horse who is able to perform movements that previously he could only do through application of superior muscle.

We continue to be pleased. Next lesson will be in November, which gives me time to collect more pennies, and to get Capria back up and on the roster. I really want to see what she has to say about this.